unfringed | File #004 video

[Walter turns on the video for the journal, sets it up and then moves back, sitting down on a chair in front of it. He's wear a lab coat over his usual checkered shirt and sweater cardigan combo and looks quite gleeful, gesturing toward the camera with a welcoming motion.]

Fellow denizens of Luceti! My name is Walter Bishop and I come to you with a unique request.

I would like to take a tissue and wing sample from every person in the compound - a simple test, really, very quick, not at all painful [Says the man who can tolerate electroshock therapy with a smile] - in order to help the scientists of our great community better understand the makeup of this universe.

Should you and several of your companions be from the same world, it would be most helpful if one or all could donate, although one should suffice if anyone is a tad squeamish.

I will be taking the samples this afternoon in the plaza.

Oh! And hot cocoa will be provided for compensation of course. I'm no madman.

This afternoon, starting at 1pm. Any and all volunteers are welcome! Those who don't wish to volunteer, don't worry - I'm sure I can find you somehow, yes?

[Action: Plaza, 1PM]
[As promised, Walter is bundled up in warmer clothes at the plaza with a little table of lab equipment and a rather large cooler that holds several Thermoses of hot cocoa. There are even little marshmallows for people who want them.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Those'll probably hurt less. Lucky you.

You seem very angry.

I would suggest taking something for it - but I still haven't been able to find a good cannabis substitute here. Odd that the plant doesn't grow here at all.

Angry? Who, me? No clue what that plant is, but if it's some kind of drug -- been there, done that.

Oh, yes, quite the recreational one at that - very relaxing, could do you some good. I've found a weak substitute for LSD, but not for that. Odd, really. It's a naturally occurring flora and yet not in this world.

Is that your thing, then? Doping yourself into bliss?

Into bliss?

...No, not exactly.

LSD can be used to open the mind, rather than close it. I prefer a personal mixture of different cannabis plants, if I want to shut out the world - works much better, much better. Although the side effects can be...unwanted if your mind isn't ready for it.

[ Your refined taste in narcotics is wasted on this one. ]

Too bad you haven't found any, huh.

[Walter is sad, but not surprised. His refined tastes are lost on 99% of the population.]

It really is, yes. Thank you, my dear, for being so understanding.

But what is your name? I don't believe we introduced ourselves. I'm Dr. Walter Bishop, current inmate of Luceti, and a scientist.

Johanna Mason. Thrilled to meet you. [ Only a truly oblivious person would miss the sarcasm dripping from her tone. ] I stand by what I said about the test tubes.

But I told you, there aren't any test tubes. I'm taking skin and blood samples to help further our understanding of how to get home.

Don't you want to be home?

[ There's a pause. That is interesting. ]

How are bloody bits of flesh going to help you figure that one out?

Because with them I can test at what frequency your DNA - and thus your world - vibrates. Find out the frequency, isolate it and you can send matter back. In theory it's a very simple process of getting you to vibrate back in time with your universe and out of time with this one.

[ With her poor grasp of both scientific knowledge and science fiction tropes, it's all incomprehensible to her. ]

If it's so simple why hasn't anyone figured it out yet? Seems like this place is crawling with scientists and doctors and magicians and other clever smartasses.

Not everyone is capable of connecting musical theory with scientific theory. I have experience in the field.

Also, I say "in theory" for a reason. Isolating this universe's harmonic frequency is going to be extremely difficult because every entrance and exit seems to change it.

So basically you have no clue what you're doing.

I have a good many clues - just no concrete answers yet. It's how science happens, I'm afraid.

It's going to take a little more than that. To get me to give away pieces of myself.

It's only a very small piece - nothing I could use to do anything with besides the research I've already explained to you.

[He laughs nervously a bit.]

I-It isn't as if I could clone anyone from this. Not enough genetic material by a milestone. And besides, a blood and tissue sample is hardly anything to worry over. Try having parts of your brain removed - that will throw you for a loop.

Brains, vital organs, fingernails, I don't care. I'm keeping all of them.

Edited 2014-02-05 07:16 (UTC)

Well, of course you are. I wouldn't want someone's fingernails anyway. Too much chance of contamination.

Why would anyone want fingernails?

Dunno. But mine are contaminated, all right. [ She glances at her own hands -- they're filthy. ]

Then I certainly wouldn't want them. I only need skin and blood samples.

I'm sure the halfwits around here will be willing to scrape something up for you.

My dear, compared to the intellect I'm used to, 95% of this village could be classified as "half-wits." Not to discount them, of course, but after keeping company with some of the most brilliant minds in the country for many years, by definition, my standards are much higher than those of normal people.

File #004 video

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